Screw Valentine's Day. Hooray for Singles Awareness Day! I'm proud to be a spinster cat lady, gosh darn it. So buy chocolates for your other single friends and rejoice in your freedom! Yaaaaaay! (Better yet, wait a few days and then buy the chocolate on sale. Valentine's Day is the second best post-holiday chocolate sales event, after Easter.)
I enjoy being single. I can do pretty much whatever I want, whenever I want. I can use my money in any way I want, I can get as many pets as I can handle (I've always wanted a piggy, especially after watching that Cute Overload video of Kingston repeatedly today), nobody ever goes on my computers without consent, and I can drink juice straight out of the bottle. There's no jealousy, no commitments, no 3 am phone calls, no "we need to talk," and no worrying about how you're going to get out of it. I only have to share my bed with the cats, and they don't snore (although they do like climbing on me and licking my face to wake me up). I can leave porn lying out in the open if I feel like it. I can watch cheesy romantic comedies without worrying about anyone laughing at me. I can have the poster of the shirtless guy knitting on a knit "bear" rug in my craft room. I don't have to worry about pregnancy, STDs, psycho exes, in-laws, or people leaving the toilet seat up. I am freeeeeee! And I love it.
I also love chocolate. So thanks, all you taken people, for keeping the holiday alive so I can get my fix.
(Although I do hate hate HATE the rampant amount of pink. Blech.)